Stress Buster
Drew Cullen offers a laid-back guide to survival in the modern salesoffice where the going is going to get tougher.
In every generation, the twin forces of greed and stress drive the sales executive. Businesses may humiliate their staff, they may crank up the targets to unreasonable levels, they may even sack the worst performer of the month. But they also furnish survivors with juicy bonuses, hefty OTEs, and every perk their hearts could desire.
Greed is good for the bank balance. And so too is stress - when handled properly. Unfortunately the stress levels experienced by salespeople today are beginning to look increasingly out of kilter with the rewards.
And the products you sell are to blame.
Work is "much more highly pressurised than it was 20 years ago," says Liz Simpson, a consultant with Interact, a Holborn-based company which supplies company health analysis surveys and advises companies how to counteract stress-related demotivation and illness. And we are seeing much more symptoms of stress. Technology is dictating the way we work.
Rather than the other way around. And people are feeling that they are losing control. "There is rapid change in the work environment and human beings aren't that good at dealing with change. This is manifested in stress. Also there is much less activity in the workplace than before.
With computers, jobs are more static. You are more likely to be tied to your desk. And there is much less reason to get up."
Field salespeople have little reason to feel complacent too, Simpson says. "More business is being conducted by email, and there is less one-to-one or group interaction, which can lead to social isolation. This is a well known stress indicator." Simpson, whose corporate clients are drawn principally from the south-east, notes low-level chronic stress in the London working population. Travel conditions are unpleasant, work is difficult, and people give themselves insufficient time to relax.'
Let Infomatics Digest take the strain. We have assembled the Rough Guide to executive stress relief - read it carefully and it may just help you ward off your next ulcer.
HIT YOUR TARGETS
The only way to cure stress , according to Frank Noon, the Managing Director of the Altrincham computer services firm Xenon, is to "meet your targets.
You only feel stress when you underachieve. If you are still stressed you are in the wrong job."
This is a useful starting point, but perhaps a little too gung-ho. Targets are all well and good, but a little arbitrary. It is not unknown for companies to imposed entirely unattainable targets, as a prelude to forcing out employees whose faces don't fit.
Some companies are notorious for their aggressive hire and fire policies.
Sales executives who work for such concerns will always feel stressed, no matter how often they reach their targets.
Take Alex, a high-rolling account handler at an American computer company based in the Thames Valley. "The definition of an optimistic salesman here is someone who irons five shirts on Sunday afternoon. It is a great job, but a rubbish career. The company treats its customers like shite.
So how do you think it treats its employees? There is no stigma in getting fired from this company - everyone expects it. You are just a bum on a seat. But you earn good money."
MONEY, MONEY, MONEY
Alex is leaving his job, after two years. "I have been shafted once too often and I am on my way out. I went into this with my eyes open. This was always a short-term situation. Stay here too long and you are unemployable.
But stay a couple of years and the world is your oyster. The job has been good for the CV - it has taught me to be a bit tougher, to be on the ball, to be a bit more of a go-getter. Now I am being offered double my base salary, although the OTE is less."
BUT DON'T BE TOO GREEDY
Martin Clarke, Sales Director of Lapland, a specialist mobile computer reseller, says: "Reward yourself - but set yourself realistic goals. In sales these should be growth milestones." The 80s have gone - thank God.
It is not just work hard, play hard - the quality of your life is more important. It is fine if you want to drink champagne in a wine bar but understand that is what you want to do. Then go out and get three cases of vintage champagne.
Lapland's sales floor is a highly charged environment, Clarke says.
"My job is to crank up the team or to relieve stress - whatever is most helpful to improving productivity. All the people here largely live beyond their needs but not hugely so. Their personal needs and aspirations run slightly ahead of their income - so the targets are achievable. And in return they get constant reward."
NEEDLE AND THE DAMAGE DONE
Cigarettes and alcohol are by far the most popular self-prescribed nostrums for coping with life's infinite stresses. "My colleagues drink themselves stupid at the end of every day - and I join them," Alex says.
Unfortunately, these drugs are "all too efficient as stress relievers," according to Interact's Simpson. "They do work well in the short term and they help to relax." But there are obvious side-effects as any fule kno. It is easy to go overboard with alcohol, as Simpson points out. "You go into the office the next day with a hangover which means you can't work properly and you feel even more stressed at the end of the day."
The only cure for a hangover, as Noon points out, is "to stay drunk".
But this strategem may fail to impress your clients or colleagues or your boss.
Cocaine is a popular performance-enhancer, which imparts a certain energy to those too lazy join the company gym. It will certainly help you to burn the candles at both ends. Alan McGee, the multi-millionaire owner of Creation Records, who now eschews mood-altering drugs, recently revealed that "running the businss was a lot easier when I was out of my head on coke all day".
But there are some not inconsiderable drawbacks. Cocaine is, as Robin Williams once memorably said, God's way of telling you that you are too rich. This should not present too much problem to the high-rolling sales executive. But it has a way of spiralling out of control. And it is against the law. Just say no.
If you are subject to anxiety attacks, you could always raid the NHS for Temazapam or Prozac. But these should be seen as short-term palliatives only. Beta blockers will keep your hyper-tension under control. But remember, they are for life.
EXECUTIVE PLAYTHINGS
One should never underestimate the power of stress management toys - if you are prepared to risk looking weak and vulnerable. Newton Balls have had their day - and now function alongside lava lamps, only as ironic post-modernist interior decoration statements. Worry beads are timeless, but are perhaps better left to elderly Levantines who know how to use them properly. If you do decide on the worry beads, make sure everyone can see what you are doing. Use them behind your desk, and your colleagues may think you are fiddling with your genitals. This is a classic stress indicator among the under-fives, but wildly inappropriate in any office setting.
Or you could try out the latest gadget: the personal electronic stress arrester. Retailing at u24.99, this handheld device tells you how fast you are breathing. The idea is that you try breathing again more slowly.
It is endorsed by John Harvey-Jones, which shows how far the mighty can fall. Then again, you could think bigger. Ruby Wax owns her own flotation tank, while Bruce Gyngell, Chief Executive of Yorkshire-Tyne Tees Television, jumps up and down on a trampoline during the course of the day. Splendid ideas, but remember that celebrities and celebrity businessmen are given more leeway than other mere mortals. They are feted and indulged. You will become a marked man.
BEAT ON THE BRAT
Some people prefer to deal with their stress with symbolic acts of violence.
Japanese factory workers, for example, belabour effigies of their bosses with staves, kindly supplied by their employers. We do things differently here. "Managing stress for me is apologising to my wife after shouting at her," Alex says.
Lapland's Clarke vents his spleen on inanimate objects. "I used to kick my phone - but my business partner got very cheesed off with me, after I killed the third one. They were far too expensive to destroy. Now I am a master of the keyboard swinging across the room. There is the explosion and then it is all over. And I don't bear grudges - as long as I don't have to pick up the pieces afterwards. The other people tend to watch my outbursts with interest. They also duck." Clarke can do this because he is the boss. But underlings are not supposed to act in this fashion.
It is probably better to wait until you leave the office. By all means, cut up a few cars on the way home. But do try to be nice to your family.
However stressful your job is, divorce and maintenance payments are even worse.
Alex has the right idea. "I pack my family off for year-end so I don't shout at them. American companies are driven by end of quarter and you have to do your numbers."
MIND OVER MATTER
You could always cultivate an inner calm. Tai Chi, Yoga and transcendental mediation are all well-proven techniques. If lack of self esteem is your problem, you could always go on a reassuringly expensive EST course. You will feel good about yourself and make lots of new friends.
But make sure you avoid any self-improvement course run by any organisation which preaches self-denial. This will blunt your competitive edge in any tender situation.
There is a certain Buddhist sect, to which three people of my acquaintance belong, which asserts that you can attain your material goals by chanting.
This strikes me as the perfect religion for the status-driven capitalist.
WE MUST DO OUR EXERCISES
Stress is "an ancient reflex", according to Simpson. "It is a chemical reaction - which leads to ulcers, irritable bowel syndrome and heart disease." But don't despair. These chemicals are used up when you exercise. Dust down your squash racket, hit the gyms and burn off that excess stress.
Alternatively, a brisk daily 30 minute walk should suffice. Get a dog.
You have a walking companion for life. And something to kick when life is getting on top of you.
TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE
The trouble with exercise is that most of us hate it. Clarke used to play rugby. Now he just likes to watch. He also cheers on the company soccer team from the sidelines most week-ends. Why doesn't he join in the fun? "They would never dream of selecting me. And I would never dream of playing," he says. "I would never do anything to embarrass the company." Sounds like a rotten excuse to me.
"People will give you 101 reasons why they are too busy to work-out," Simpson says. Which is why her company offers time management courses.
This is a poor substitute for a lighter workload, and reasonable targets, but it could be worth a try. Time management enables you to take more control of your life, but it also means you spend an awful lot of your day colour-coding your diary into red, green and blue time.
ERGONOMICS
It is vital that you work in a comfortable environment, particularly if you are tied to the desk. You could be a victim of phone neck (caused by wedging the telephone between the head and shoulder) or computer-related RSI, or a cricked neck. Use a headset, make sure your workstation is set up properly, get a proper chair.
Field salespeople are at risk too, especially if they are heavy mobile phone users. There is apparently a condition called mobile users shoulder drop, discovered by neurologist Anthony Hopkins, after treating a driver who lost the full use of his right arm for a month, after just two hours on the phone. Hopkins diagnosed pressure palsy, a damaged nerve in the patient's neck, caused by its compression through lengthy contact with the handset's hard edge. Hands-free in-car headsets will help you avoid this alarming condition. Plantronics, which describes itself as the world's leading manufacturer of headsets, has a product called Freehand, which works with Ericsson, Motorola and Nokia headsets. It costs u79.99, and I am reliably informed by the company's PR representative that it offers unbeatable value.
Building a happy sales-floor is even more important that the details of the office furniture, according to Jonathan Chapple, chairman of Equanet, the u25 million Chessington computer dealer. "The sales floor is comfortable with good, soft acoustics. And we have an adjacent coffee room where people can have a smoke or chill out for 20 minutes.
"In the sales floor we use music - not industrial, non-invasive wallpaper Muzak - but real music, which gets people jumping. Customers hear it and know that they are through to Equanet. It is part of the brand image.
There is high level of ambient noise - with a lot of shouting over the sales pods. And there is a huge amount of interpersonal communication, through morning and evening meetings. Without this, the stress would rise.
The team has to be comfortable with itself. All these things - plus money - ensure a very happy team."
IT'S GOOD TO TALK
Business is stressful "only when people fail to communicate," Chapple says. Stress is a function of worry, not of hard work. If you are comfortable and happy in your job, you won't typically feel a lot of stress.
BUT WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS
The boss is an ogre, the office is full of back-stabbers. Some causes of stress are outside your control. But these things seriously damage your health. As Chapple points out: "Whenever I have encountered conflict, I have always either left or got rid of the cause."
This is an entirely sensible course of action. Get out while the going is bad. Because it will only get worse. Never let the bastards grind you down.